TIGS - Chesttop Computing and Giving Up on Days

I started to feel like the world was conspiring against me. I was all gung ho to kick my 50s off with a bang but then I got a cold and once the cold listed, I tweaked my back while cleaning up my apartment. But then I realized that it wasn’t that the world was out to get me, I’m just old.

But we’re back to blogging, at least!

Two TIGS - things I gotta stop - are resting my laptop on my chest and giving up on days.

With my eyesight going - did I mention I was old - and my laziness always winning, I spend a lot of time lying on my couch and to best see my laptop, I plop it right on my chest. I feel like I’m probably burning my lungs out by doing it and I definitely sense something going on. I googled if it was bad for you but why would I trust the computer to tell me that the computer was killing me? This is how SkyNet takes control!

The other bad habit that i have to nix is that i often give up on days. I have plans to get stuff done in the morning and when that doesn’t happen, I just throw my hands up and kind of say “Day ruined” and then half-ass my way through the rest of the day. Especially with working out, I have to just push my workout to later in the day rather than just saying “Welp, I guess it didn’t happen today. Weird. It’s the 23392th day in a row when I didn’t work out.”

Rexpectations: They Will Kill You

One of my pet peeves is when people who clearly don’t like a genre or type of film review the films and seem shocked that they don’t like a movie they expected not to like. Now, I can’t say that I expected to hate They Will Kill You but it become apparent very early on that this is the exact kind of low brow, gore and violence are the draw, type of flick that is just not for me.

The plot of They Will Kill Me is, according to Wikipedia, “the film follows an ex-convict who answers an ad to be a housekeeper at a mysterious New York City high-rise that has seen a number of disappearances over the years.”

EXPECT: A WANNA-B MOVIE
I can’t say that I’m a fan of b-movies but I can at least appreciate that some films are so good that they are bad. What I have a harder time appreciating are films that try intentionally to be bad. I feel like a lot of the “comedy” of this movie revolves around the hokeyness of the effects. And the silliness of the violence. Again, that just does nothing for me so to see that this film cost three times as much as “Ready Or Note” which I think was a far superior movie just makes me think that it is a waste of money.

EXPECT: “BITCH” COMEDY
There are still WAY too many people making movies who think that adding “bitch” to the end of comments is the height of hilarity. To me, it’s just painfully lazy writing. But, again, that’s kind of the point of this movie. But there’s really nothing all that creative about this movie and nothing clever about the humor.

EXPECT: A WASTED CAST
This film has a number of recognizable names and, sadly, not a single one of them chews the scenery. Again, the script is so bad it’s just bad and there’s nothing to really work with.

If you like absurd, splatterhouse horror movies, you may not be let down by this one but I think I can say with some certainty that this isn’t a film that is going to win over any new converts to the genre. And, honestly, I wonder how much the “real” fans of splatterhouse will feel because it could be seen as a bit of a try hard as opposed to a legit entry into the genre. But, again, this film is clearly not for me so if this looks like a film you’d like, don’t let me dissuade you from seeing it.

The Lunch Rotation (October '26)

I’ve decided against counting delivery as a New Thing. One of the main goals of the 500 New Things Challenge is to get me out of the apartment so it doesn’t make sense to count something that I never leave home for. Still, I haven’t been writing and need some content so why not start building my lunch rotation for DTLA. I’ll add to this as time goes on but right now it seems to be:

AMBOY QUALITY MEATS (CHINATOWN)
Amboy is a great burger and fries spot and my favorite burger in the area.

PRIME PIZZA (LITTLE TOKYO)
There’s nothing that stands out to me about Prime Pizza but it’s a good slice and it’s pretty much down the street from me so it’s a quick and easy go to. It also helps that it might be my favorite slice in DTLA.

THE CHOW MEIN GUY (LITTLE TOKYO)
Having grown up on fake Chinese food aka East Coast “Szechuan” Chinese food (RIP CHINA BLOSSOM IN NORTH ANDOVER!), I still haven’t found a Chinese place that I love - Chi Dynasty in Los Feliz is probably my #1 but it’s too far to order from - so my go to has been a food truck that’s on 2nd street in between Central and San Pedro. For around 15 bucks (20 bucks if you add on shrimp), you get enough chow mein for a lunch and then breakfast the next day. I think the spicy option is almost a perfect level of heat for me - you can feel it but it’s not overpowering.

CALIFORNIA CHICKEN CAFE (DTLA)
The bachelor special - you get a full chicken and four pitas with mashed potatoes and you have lunch and leftovers that can cover you most of the next day.

CHICK-FIL-A (DTLA)
Ah, I just can’t quit you, you homophobic chicken, you! It’s a good spicy chicken sandwich!

FTW (GRAND CENTRAL MARKET)
A solid burger joint. I prefer Amboy but GCM is in walking distance of my apartment and it’s a good alternative.

Rexpectations: The Only Living Pickpocket in New York

The Only Living Pickpocket in New York (New Thing #5) is a new film from Noah Segan, who is best known as the guy that Rian Johnson works into all of his films. He was the other detective in Knives Out and the slacker friend randomly staying on Edward Norton’s island in the sequel.

The film is about John Turturro’s pickpocket who robs the wrong person and then has to deal with the consequences. I’d recommend skipping the trailer because it pretty much hits all of the main beats of the film so I feel like it would be better to go in blind.

EXPECT: A THROWBACK MOVIE
This is the kind of movie that people say don’t get made anymore. It is a very straightforward film that drops the audience in the middle of the urban subculture - in this case, aging crooks - and then plays out a fairly straightforward story.

DON’T EXPECT: OFFBEAT CHARACTERS
This is a film littered with people who are pretty much run down by life and at the end of their run. This isn’t one of those NY stories with all of these characters you wouldn’t meet anywhere else.

DON’T EXPECT: IT TO STICK THE LANDING
I always wonder if I should mention the ending or just let people figure this part out on their own but I feel like this one left me with a WTF feeling that I think it’s probably better for people to be ready for so as not to be too let down.

All in all, The Only Living Pickpocket in New York falls into the fine but forgettable bucket.

Rexpectations: Fjord

Recxpectations are my recommended expectations that someone should have when they start to watch a film. New Thing #4 was Fjord, a film about a very religious couple who moved from Romania to Norway and run afoul with the law when it is discovered that they spank their children and bring them up in an ultra-religious manner (no dancing, no modern music, etc.)

EXPECT: A TRUE TO LIFE FILM
I can’t speak to how close to factual this film is - the one negative review took it to task for painting Child Protective Services as a villain - but when I say it is True To Life, I mean that it isn’t overly dramatized or punched up to make it more interesting. This isn’t an Aaron Sorkin script where everyone is capable of delivering memorable monologues and funny quips. Sebastian Stan’s lead character is a stoic Romanian man of few words. Renate Reinsve is the quiet churchgoing wife.

DON’T EXPECT: ANSWERS
This film was inspired by multiple cases of foreigners moving to the very progressive Nordic country and running afoul with the law because of cultural differences. And it doesn’t really take a stance either way. The film doesn’t give equal time to the Child Protective Services side, which I’m sure will annoy a lot of people, but I didn’t find that it went to any extra lengths to portray the family as the victims.

EXPECT: 2.5 HOURS
I almost cancelled my ticket when I saw how long the film is but I stuck with it and am happy I did. I did get a little nervous when I first checked the time and realize that only an hour had passed but I didn’t really feel bored at any point. Story-wise, it’s a very tight film, especially once the main conflict arises.

New Things* #3: Alamo Drafthouse

This one gets an asterisk because for this run at 500 New Things, I wiped the slate clean so everything is new. Alamo isn’t truly new as I’ve been there countless time but for the sake of this challenge, it counts.

I love the film selection at Alamo and the audiences are respectful. Some of the food options have dipped since the company was sold to Sony. I don’t love the new ordering via phone but it’s not as bad as I initially feared. The DTLA Alamo is at The Bloc, which is now up for sale and could become a residential high rise in the near future so I’m nervous that we might not have The Alamo for much longer. With a 14 screen Alamo Hollywood coming in early 2028, I wouldn’t be completely stunned if the DTLA location shut down. Fingers crossed that it stays around but, honestly, the Regal LA Live isn’t terrible and it’s a quick train ride to Pasadena for some of the smaller indie films.

Recxpectations: Clayface

Recxpectations are my recommended expectation that people should have when they go into a movie. My latest trip to the theater was for “Clayface” (New Thing #2), the DC movie about the shapeshifting Batman villain.

EXPECT: A LIVE ACTION DC ANIMATED MOVIE
For years, people have been hyping up DC’s animated slate of films and TV shows. In fact, writer/producer Mike Flanagan said he was inspired by Batman; The Animated Series, I’ve tried to watch these shows and I’ve never been drawn in. They are pretty formulaic and bare bones and just not very interesting to me. “Clayface” seems to follow this approach. This is not a film that swings for the fences. They aren’t trying anything new or innovative here, they are simply giving you a straightforward origin story. And, honestly, given what a mess Sony has made of the Spidey spin-offs, that’s not the worst idea. “Clayface” works. It’s a animated show turned into a body horror movie. I can’t imagine it will be anyone’s favorite superhero-related movie* but, at the same time, I feel like only people expecting the next Dark Knight will hate it. It’s a perfectly fine film.
* I could see people saying it’s one of the best recent superhero films but I think that says more about the recent superhero films than it does Clayface.

DON’T EXPECT; A GREAT FINAL ACT
One thing that “Clayface” couldn’t fix was the superhero movie issue of having lackluster final acts. “Clayface” doesn’t become the usual CG1 fest like most Marvel movies but it’s a fairly forgettable, length action scene that doesn’t the bare minimum with a shapeshifting character. The most memorable section might be a bizarre dance moment that made me wonder if the film was devolving into camp.

EXPECT: MOSTLY FORGETTABLE CASTING
I’m a fan of Naomie Ackie and think she did well. Tom Rhys Harries did a good job with what he had to work with but didn’t really elevate any moments IMO. Beyond them, the characters kind of felt lackluster. David Dencik didn’t have a ton to do as the main baddie but he also added nothing to the character. Max Minghella does not give Gotham Homicide Detective to me and nothing about his performance really changed my mind on that. The henchman are immediately forgettable.

DON’T EXPECT: CAMEOS
I’m sure there are some Easter eggs that I missed since I’m not a comic book reader but this isn’t a film that throws in any cameos from other DC heroes. There also isn’t a post-credit sequence.

EXPECT: DCU NOT THE BATMAN U
While this is a darker film than Superman or Supergirl, this film feels more in line with those films’ DC Universe (where it is intended to take place) than the universe of The Batman movie and Penguin show. Personally, I felt like Lanterns felt more at home in The Batman universe. This almost feels like a standalone film. It doesn’t really introduce us to Gotham that much. As noted, there aren’t any cameos that I noticed that give a nod to the upcoming Batman

New Word Coinage - lAIzy

Laizy - pronounce Lay-EYE-zee - is the word we should use for AI slop that is just painfully lazy and without any quality control at all. A perfect example popped up on Amazon’s NBA broadcast last night. They have a new feature that is in BETA testing - which again, seems to have come to mean there will be no quality control - called Insights, that you’d think could be a cool deep dive of stats or callbacks that have related the game one is watching. The first “insight” for the Warriors/Grizzlies game was:

It was the third day of the season, people! The Grizz and Dubs literally hadn’t even finished two games in the season when this was posted. Making matters worse, there were only five insights for the game so it’s not like it would have been very hard for anyone to fact check these. Instead of fact checking and having one iota of quality control, Amazon Prime just threw a disclaimer on the bottom. WHAT IS THE POINT OF AN INSIGHT IF IT MIGHT BE WRONG?!

AI is an extremely useful tool but it is just maddening how corporations are rushing it out into the world before it is ready.

New Thing #1: Lucky's DTLA

To kick off 500 New Things for my 50th, I decided to try out the new steakhouse in DTLA - Lucky’s. Lucky’s is a bit of a chain with six locations and it was… fine.

I got the New York Strip with peppercorn sauce, which was a bit of a surprise because I ordered the NY Strip w/ Rocquefort which was one of Lucky’s “Special” steaks. The steak was fine. Nothing interesting about it. The peppercorn sauce was equally OK. The mashed potatoes were solid but nothing all that memorable. It’ll be interesting to see how long Lucky’s survives since it’s in a not-so-great area of DTLA. There are a few restaurants in the vicinity but I just don’t know if an semi-upscale steakhouse is really the best option for that area. It really needs to be a destination and, for me, Lucky’s is not that. I might go back to try out the Romanian steak - I overheard a waiter recommending it to the couple next to me - but odds are I probably won’t. Not with 499 new things still needing to be done!

As a reminder, The 500 New Things Challenge is something I do to get my butt out of the house and get me to be active. I need to try 500 new restaurants, shows, events, films, etc. In honor of me turning 50, though, I’m wiping my slate clean so everything is new! This will make the 500 a lot easier to get to but also, with so many places struggling nowadays, it lets me visit my favorite haunts at least once. The thing with LA is that there are so many options that you often can love a place and then never make it back. With the clean slate, there’s an added drive to revisit spots like Amigo Amore, a restaurant I really enjoyed but just never made time for a return trip.

The Launch of Old Man Mendo

Well, I hit 50 years old today so it seems like a good time for a fresh start. I have a lot that I want to do so I need to just admit from the jump that the blog isn’t going to be my top priority but I’m going to try to keep with it this time around. Yes, I’ve tried keeping up with a blog at least once or twice a year for the last three decades but, again, this is a fresh start and rule #1 for Old Man Mendo is stay committed and get things done. No more procrastination.

On the fresh start front, I’m also going to re-relaunch my 500 New Things Challenge but with a clean slate so everything is new! I also want to rework my Menu de Mendo (my favorite dishes in LA) and The Lists (Lists of my favorite spots, events, etc.) The end of 2026 is also going to be a chance to put to bed the scripts I’ve been toying with for the last couple decades so I can start 2027 working on new ideas. I also should just put some projects to bed as I’ll never get to them. Another blog post I want to do.. no, that I’m GOING to do is TIGS - Things I Gotta Stop. My initial TIGS is going to be a habit I broke once but have fallen back into - I Gotta Stop… drinking soda before noon.

Anyway, it’s a new decade of Mendo. Old Man Mendo doesn’t mean that I’m just going to sit around being decrepit - because I pretty much did that in my 40s - but it’ll be about making the most of the home stretch of my life. Maybe not the home stretch per se but the waning years of vitality. I think back to my aunt talking about how she went to Greece recently and she wished that she had gone earlier in her life because there were a bunch of things she couldn’t do because the walks were too hard or it was just too difficult for her to access at her age.